Doing What’s Right for Yourself
Last week I had to make the hardest decision I’ve made in years.
For the past year and a half, I’ve been working my dream job. I’m a brewer. Ever since I was 19, I was in love with craft beer. My ancestors are mostly Irish and Scottish and at 18, my family and I spent a couple weeks in Ireland. During our time in Dublin, we toured the Guiness Factory.
The beginning of the tour is an impressive museum about their history and how beer is made. I was obsessed with a photograph of brewers raking mash (the grain that was used to make the beer) out of a steaming mash tun. I had no idea why I was so drawn to it, but it’s image was imprinted on my mind.
When I got back to the states I met some brewers and started spending time in their brewery. It was amazing to watch them work. The conditions are intense. It’s really hot, all the time. Everything weighs 50+ pounds, you’re always sweating through your clothes or wet from the work you’re doing, and there’s always so much to do! I was instantly in love. Not only is it physical work, but there’s an amazing end product that you get to share with your community. The whole concept was incredible to me.
Fast forward 18 years. I’m focused on living authentically and in the middle of a career change. I had to really think of how I wanted to spend most of my waking hours. No one was going to hire me to hike or camp, so I had to keep thinking. I was drinking a lovely local beer while pondering this. I need to do something physical. Computers give me headaches, so it’d have to be manual labor. What can I do? I took a sip of my New England style IPA (yes- I’m one of them…) and as I felt the juicy, citrus flavor explode on my tongue, I realized- I want to be a brewer.
Brewing is something I’ve wanted to do for 18 years, but never had the chance. At this point in my life the world truly was my oyster, so I applied as assistant brewer at a new brewery. Although I had zero experience, they hired me!
This last year and a half has been close to perfect. I’ve learned and have been successful at my new craft, met folks in the industry, and even came up with a beer recipe that’s always our best or second best seller. Life has been pretty sweet.
Since people love the beer so much, production ramped up. I was the only person in production, so that meant I started working overtime, most weeks. There wasn’t really anyone else to help me and my work-life balance was out of control. I was always tired, my body hurt, and I barely had energy to make dinner so I wasn’t eating that well. I lifted around 1000+ pounds most days and was too exhausted to do any type of conscious exercise, so my anxiety started creeping up. I was even too tired to socialize or properly take care of myself and my home on my days off. I was a mess.
After months of asking for help in production, I realized it wasn’t coming. For a week I stressed, cried, and meditated about what I should do. I couldn’t keep working at this pace and knew I had to take care of myself. A couple days later, I learned a brewery 10 minutes from home was hiring. I stopped by with no expectations, just to see what their set up was and what they were doing. I was ecstatic as I pulled in.
The brewery is also an organic farm. It has a beautiful farm stand that sells everything you’d need and it’s also the tap room. They even have pick your own flowers! If I had designed a space, it’d be just like this. Everyone had great energy and the owners were sweet and laid back. It was a good vibe so far. As I walked to where the brewery is, I passed their vegetable gardens. The rainbow chard was especially striking in the dusk light.
Just like the rest of the property, the brewery was perfect. Smaller and more manageable than what I’d been working in, which is what I was looking for. It was super clean with really nice equipment, and it had a glass garage door that overlooked the gardens and taproom. The owner said you can watch people drink beer while you’re making it. That flooded my heart with warmth. This would be a perfect place to do what I love.
I was given the brewing position and spent a long weekend celebrating, before I had to put in notice at my current job. Even though I was ready to move on to the new brewery, I had to take some time to grieve what I was leaving. Yes, it was too much work for me without help, but I was surrounded by good people. It’s where I learned to brew. I have a lot of really great memories there. I let myself mourn that chapter of life and then I began to move on.
I could finally let myself sink into the excitement of the new job! Not only will I learn even more about brewing and will be working with some amazing people, I can also learn about the farming aspect of it. My goal is to have a homestead and I fully believe this phase of life will be preperation for that.
What I’m getting at with all of this is- sometimes doing what’s right for you can be hard. But you deserve it. If you find yourself wanting something more than you have, then take the opportunity that can deliver it to you. It’s ok to do what you feel is right, even if it comes with change So, is there anything you’re looking for? Do you see any ways to get it? Be honest and open with yourself and once the right opportunity comes along, you’ll know it. I hope you’ll be brave enough to take it.
